Sunday, October 17, 2010

Improvements: Elevators

  • Put in swanky washrooms. You have a couple of minutes to kill, why not freshen up while you wait. And it has to have an attendant, with hot towels and tips on horse races.
  • Install kiddy-slides on all floors. Elevator Up - Slide Down.
  • Convert elevator buttons to also operate as a slot machine.
  • In order to carry more passengers, install a much larger propeller. The current ones on elevator ceilings are way, way, too small.
  • Install a music jukebox so I can choose my own elevator music.
  • "Mystery Floor" button.
  • Have elevators that go side to side, as well as up and down, so you can get off right at the door.
  • Doors that make the "swish" sound, like the ones on the turbo-lift on Star Trek.
  • Mirrored floors on elevators. What? It's so I can check if I have gum on the bottom of my shoe! Why else would you put a mirror on the floor?
  • Vending machines for snacks, coffee, soda, samosas and stuff. (but not the stuff you get from a washroom vending machines)
  • Elevator music by actual preforming elevator musicians. 

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